26.2.15

How Yoga Sustains Grieving

When the doctor walked out of the room and announced the passing of Naa'ila the scream of my voice certainly reached the outskirts of town. In the middle of that night of end of October 2014 I screamed to the sky
the sudden passing of my beloved young beautiful daughter. That same very moment of bottomless excruciating pain contained its corollary: a pure state of bliss, of clear cut connection with some heavenly force that drew me out of the reality. I had no more feet, could not feel the ground nor the physical boundaries of my own body. I had a special force making me walk, talk, and act.

The next days went fast full of people, crowds of peers, and friends coming and going, helping or crying. In the midst of the  momentum i kept repeating the same sentence: life goes on, if i stop holding classes, energy stops and if energy stops, life stops. Life must go on and i will continue to hold classes.

That day, twenty persons sat down in lotus and waited for the class to start. I held the class with the intention of sharing the  breath of life, the thread that keeps us all alive, the thread of prana. Since that day many events unfolded at fast pace and time is coming close to start sharing the heightened states of consciousness i am experiencing.

How yoga helps me sustain grief since day one is still an unfolding story; yet i can share a few interesting aspects:

- Deep connection to prana: i can switch instantly to another lens of experience and live yoga to the roots of any of its petal (ethics, focus, posture, concentration, meditation,  bliss);

- Discipline: the more i practice, the less i carry grief as a heavy weight, i can cry during a practice and it can burst at any moment, but crying is not grief rather release;

-  I find harmony, balance and strength as well as routine in the practice : the discipline of the routine gives me focus to take care of myself;
 - Ego is completely gone: i do t practice because i need to do something, The practice is all i have to share, the purpose.

May all experience peace, kindness  grace, beauty, elegance and love.